During Lent five years ago, our lives and world were jarred in ways we may not yet comprehend. Five years may be too soon to grasp how the COVID-19 pandemic has made us a changed people. We may never fully understand the subtle and not-so-subtle ways our lives have been transformed by what we went through, and are still going through, together.
Like many of you, Ruthie and I experienced the loss of lifelong friends. One was Jim Pace, a friend since childhood who became a race car driver and the most famous person from our tiny hometown of Monticello, Mississippi. Jim was a study partner with Ruthie and a supportive fellow Eagle Scout to me. He seemed indestructible, having walked away from race car collisions that most observers thought were impossible to survive.
We learned of a class reunion in 2019 after I had already made a church commitment that same weekend. We regret that we missed seeing Jim and catching up with him. In November 2020, we received the sad news that Jim had contracted COVID-19 and actually died here in a Memphis hospital.
One of the things we learned from COVID is to be more intentional about reaching out to people who have mattered in our lives over the years. On a trip back to Mississippi this February, we arranged to have lunch with Father Francis “Frank” Cosgrove, a Roman Catholic priest who has been a spiritual director and mentor to me since my days as a student at Ole Miss 40-plus years ago. Father Cos, as we all called him, now lives at St. Catherine’s retirement community in Madison, Mississippi. He battles Parkinson’s disease and is doing amazingly well. It was wonderful to see him, to reminisce about shared memories, and to tell him what a positive difference he has made in our lives. I thanked Father Cos for the example of priesthood that he has provided and for the thoughtful guidance and friendship he has given me over the years. I wouldn’t trade anything for our lunch that day. He invited us to the celebration of the 60th anniversary of his priesthood ordination this June. That date is marked in ink on our calendar. Father Cos asked me to share this invitation with mutual friends, which gave me opportunities to reach out to others who have also been important in our shared journey.
Some of the most poignant stories in the Bible are those of reunions. We just heard the story of the prodigal son coming home at last to the embrace of his father. We also recently listened to a part of the story of Joseph reuniting with his brothers and father during a worldwide crisis. One of the lessons we learned from the pandemic is feeling a sense of urgency to stay connected to persons who matter in our collective journey. Is there someone to whom you need to reach out and reconnect? How has the pandemic caused you to refocus your life?
For the past few years I have kept a list of people I need/want to catch up with. On my phone. With my grocery list. I try to get with one or two a month for a bite of lunch or a walk. It helps but then I am always adding more folks to the list…
Not a complaint. I am so grateful to have such a long list.
Nancy,
Glad you’ve come up with an intentional way to stay connected. You are blessed to have such a long list of people who matter in your life.
Love and Blessings,
Paul
Great reminder, Paul. Thank you.
Mary,
You’re welcome. Thanks for making time to stay connected with me and other friends in your circle.
Love and Blessings,
Paul
I lost my mom during the pandemic and my many siblings and myself made the decision to have her service with just us. No grandsons and granddaughters because we were so afraid they might get Covid. Even her siblings decided it was best that they not come so we made it private. It was amazing! My siblings and myself took turns telling stories of mom, things we would have never told in a crowd of people. We laughed, we cried and the minister came to me after and said, “I would never have thought this before but now I think this is what I want”. It’s funny but I have told my daughter, “this is what I want”. We all learned what was truly important during the pandemic. My mom would have loved her service. So glad we honored her.
Greta,
This is beautiful! I’m glad the intimate service you offered for your mom gave you and your siblings a chance to share stories and memories that helped you find healing, joy, and hope. I’m glad it also clarified what you want for your funeral. You are right – the pandemic taught us what is truly important.
Grace, peace, and love,
Paul
Thank you Paul,
…… you know the pandemic really affected me in ways most might think were extreme. I am thankful Jeptha died before it happened. It would have been even more frightening for me/us. I am also thankful for my time alone and experiencing me learn how to deal with it all. I still had Peanut and we both had to be safe. I too just wanted to reach out to all of those people in my life to connect in some way. I still try to do this regularly as my community of friends from all over the place keep my light shining. I will take this opportunity to thank you again for allowing me to know you were always there.
Grateful,
Zada
Zada,
You’re very welcome. I’m glad you had Peanut as a faithful, loving companion during the pandemic, and that it was a quiet time for you to process your grief and refocus your life after Jep’s death. So glad you’ve stayed connected with friends and I am blessed to be one of the recipients of your shining light.
Love,
Paul